Friday, May 8, 2015

This Mother's Day? Leave Me Alone.

photo by Raquel Bianca

I was chatting with my friend Didi at a work event yesterday, when someone asked what we were doing for Mother's Day. Didi, who is the mom of two tweens, wasted no time answering:"I just want a few hours to lock myself in a room alone and watch the Kurt Cobain documentary." The twenty-something PR girls who were standing there looked vaguely horrified, but I totally got it.

If Mother's Day is for mothers to do exactly what we want, then let me tell you exactly what we want: We want to be alone.

And if it's you now who is vaguely horrified, here's a disclaimer for all the non-moms in the room: Wanting to be alone now and then does not mean you do not love your children. I love my children. You love your children. And we love being moms. But it's also okay to love being by yourself for a few hours every once in awhile.

One of the biggest lessons you have to learn when you become a parent is that you are never, ever alone. At first it's a matter of life or death (that baby isn't going to breastfeed itself!), and later it's more a matter of always being wanted. Someone is always hungry. Someone is always bored. Someone always needs to get dressed or have their butt wiped or find one particular Barbie shoe. And that someone always needs you to handle it.

This is mostly a wonderful thing (remember when your college boyfriend dumped you and you worried that you were going to be alone forever? Congrats! Not gonna happen now. One thing I can guarantee is that once you become a mom, you will never be truly alone again). But constant companionship can also be tough. Sometimes you miss having no plans, lying around doing nothing, or wandering aimlessly without a stroller in tow. There's peace in being alone.

So this Mother's Day, I hope you receive the most luxurious gift possible. It's a gift that can't be bought at Marc, Louis, or Louboutin (or, let's be real, last-minute at CVS), but it's still priceless. The biggest luxury for a mom is time. Alone

And I hope you get some. 

So, tell me: If you're lucky enough to get a few hours alone, how would you spend them? I'd love to hear!

P.S.: Here's what I was thinking last Mother's Day. (Um, can you sense a theme here?)

5 comments:

Megan Van Weelde said...

I totally understand! As a mom who works outside of the home I feel opposite. I just want to be with my kids. I also want 8 hours of sleep!

Tinker In Me said...

Ha ha...no you are so very much not alone in feeling so. We moms are working all the time, no break for us, no one cooks for us or does laundry. Its an apt Mother's day wish. Except that its kinda hard to accomplish :)

WorkingMomMagic said...

I am taking Saturday to myself.. I am getting my nails done and bringing my kindle to a waterfront restaurant and eating lunch.. by myself!

Lisa said...

Hahaha - that is totally my traditional mothers day treat. Time to myself - and also giving yourself 'permission' (a mental thing) to spend money on yourself without thinking about all the summer/winter clothes the kids need! I usually head to the shops, stop at a cafe and eat without sitting on the edge of the chair or trying to shovel food in someone else's mouth, lie in the sun and read an actual real life actual freaking book. BLISS!

Yanira Garza said...

I'd go to a nice restaurant, most likely sushi, then wander around downtown (I'm in Chicago) and browse all the pretty home things I cannot have because my kids will break them. LOL. Oh and get a pedicure.

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